In an epic twist that’s rocking both the NHL and the wildlife world, Seattle Kraken mascot Buoy is being hailed as a hero after exposing a liberal bear costume conspiracy in Alaska,sources have confirmed.
While filming a promotional video in the Alaskan wilderness, Buoy’s blue hair and trollish antics were mistaken by a roaming brown bear as a rival.
The bear charged at Buoy, but what happened next was truly bizarre.
As the bear charged, a group of PETA members and liberal protestors—dressed in full bear costumes for reasons no one can quite explain—sprang into action, screaming for the camera crew to stop filming.
They feared they would be caught impersonating Yogi and Boo Boo once again, and one protestor yelled:
“We can’t have another scandal!”
“And we’re not Furries, these bears need our voice “
This wasn’t their first brush with disaster.
The last time these “bear activists” staged a protest, they were fined by wildlife officers for “recklessly endangering wildlife, and themselves” after trying to convince the bear to vote in the next election!
In a heroic move, Buoy stood his ground, exposing the entire bear-costume conspiracy.
Police arrived on the scene, cuffing the bear-costumed activists, while Buoy was seen kayaking down the river, shouting:
“It’s time to expose these furry vote snatchers”
As of press time, Buoy is rumored to be receiving a “Hero of the Outdoors” award from the American Conservation Coalition.
I just don’t get this. I’ll read more about it but…..???