U.S. News

SILICON VALLEY, CA — Google and Microsoft reportedly celebrated a breakthrough in artificial intelligence Monday after their spam filters became...

LOS ANGELES, CA — Los Angeles reportedly entered the final stage of its political transformation this week after democratic socialists...

MADISON, WI — Wisconsin parents reportedly entered financial cardiac arrest Thursday after learning their college-aged sons had allegedly converted hundreds...

WASHINGTON, D.C. — Sen. John Kennedy reportedly warned Americans Friday that socialism had returned wearing fresh sneakers, carrying a reusable...

NEW YORK, NY — A New York priest reportedly announced that Jesus was transgender this week, forcing 2,000 years of...

SACRAMENTO, CA — Gavin Newsom reportedly checked himself into an emergency political therapy session this week after discovering that agreeing...

WASHINGTON, D.C. — Hunter Biden reportedly announced plans for a triumphant return to the art world this week, sending the...

DETROIT, MI — America’s political commentariat reportedly abandoned elections, inflation, foreign policy, and every other issue Tuesday after discovering Kamala...

PITTSBURGH, PA — Former college quarterback Phil Jurkovec reportedly entered a brief but intense “glory days” relapse last week after...

PLAINFIELD, IL — Plainfield police reportedly prevented the largest coordinated toilet-paper offensive in suburban history after seizing 650 rolls believed...