U.S. NEWS
Ex-Biden Spin Doctor Ian Sams Defends Autopen at House Hearing, Device Immediately Launches 2028 Campaign
Ian Sams, Biden’s former spin doctor and current human fog machine, arrived at the House for the autopen scandal hearing,...
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POLITICS
Mamdani’s ‘Shared NYC’ Plan Exposed: Xboxes for All, Work for None
A Cuban-born biotech mogul who escaped socialism with his family is now running for New York City mayor as an...
WORLD NEWS
Democrats Panic as Trump–Putin Summit Threatens to End Ukraine War, Hillary Flirts with Nobel Nomination
Anchorage, AK — Panic swept through Democratic headquarters today after President Trump’s unexpected peace summit with Vladimir Putin in Alaska...
Ayatollah’s High Life: Khamenei’s Dank Days Exposed!
Iran's supreme leader’s wild lifestyle revealed, sources have confirmed. While FOX News reports Ayatollah Ali Khamenei spends his days sleeping...
Judges Caught in Eco-Love with Activists
Judges’ climate activist chats raise alarms, sources have confirmed. FOX News uncovered judges swapping eco-sweet nothings with climate activists in...
NORAD’s ‘Headbutt’ Saves Trump’s Legendary Golf Game from Rogue Plane
A rogue Cessna dared invade the hallowed airspace above Trump’s Bedminster golf course, sources have confirmed. NORAD, ever vigilant, deployed...
ENTERTAINMENT
Ana Navarro Suffers Emotional Breakdown After Discovering Melania Trump Owns a Pen
Daytime TV imploded this week when The View — a panel of self-anointed woke Looney’s who function like the mean...
Zohran Mamdani and Elizabeth Warren Drop Sleep Mixtape for Socialist Bunk Beds
College sorority “cold rooms” have officially been outed as the first step toward America’s socialist sleep experiment, sources have confirmed....
Fallon Faces Fallout After Hosting Gutfeld, NBC Deploys Weighted Blankets and Smiley Stickers to Calm Viewers
Jimmy Fallon is under investigation for “reckless endangerment of fragile minds” after hosting Greg Gutfeld on The Tonight Show, sources...
Marlin’s Moonwalk Victory Crushes AOC’s Socialist Goldfish Pipe Dream!
Maryland Angler’s Titanic Marlin Annihilates AOC’s Goldfish, Sources have confirmed In Ocean City, Maryland, Drew Osmeyer, aboard the "Barbara B,"...
SPORTS
Leftists Demand Jackson Be CANCELED After Repost
When the left saw “Lamar Jackson shared post” flash across their screens, you could practically hear the detonation of angry...
Elizabeth Warren Proposes 45-Minute Trigger Warning Before Any White House Fight
Dana White’s announcement that UFC fights will take place at the White House on July 4th, 2026 has sent the...
Seattle’s Kraken Mascot Exposes Liberal Bear Costume Conspiracy After Brown Bear Charges
In an epic twist that’s rocking both the NHL and the wildlife world, Seattle Kraken mascot Buoy is being hailed...
McRib of the Gridiron: Brady Teases Return, Patriots Fans Already Crying
Tom Brady Hints at Unretirement—Again, Sources Have Confirmed Just when you thought your fantasy team was safe and the NFL...
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