Bruce Springsteen has replaced half his set with instructions for Democrats on making President Trump miserable, sources have confirmed.
The Boss unveiled the new format Tuesday, opening with “Born to Run for Another Impeachment” before delivering a 47-minute harmonica solo intended to symbolize congressional subpoenas.
Witnesses said Springsteen then demanded Democrats retake Congress, investigate Trump’s golf handicap, outlaw breakfasts, and force every cabinet meeting to begin with a reading of Adam Schiff’s diary.
Fans who paid $900 to hear “Thunder Road” instead received a committee markup of grievances accompanied by tambourine.
Several requested refunds, but were informed their ticket purchase constituted an in-kind contribution to “critical patriotism.”
Springsteen grew frustrated when informed Trump remained unfazed.
The president spent the night eating steak, reviewing poll numbers, and asking an aide why an angry podcast had hired a saxophone section.
Determined to escalate, Springsteen added three encore numbers: “Dancing in the Dark Money Investigation,” “Glory Days of Endless Hearings,” and “Hungry Heart, Federally Funded.”
By midnight, even the E Street Band had quietly joined a Journey tribute act.
Democratic leaders praised the performance and formed a task force to determine whether celebrity lectures could win back working-class voters.
As of press time, Trump had sent Springsteen two front-row tickets to his inauguration and a handwritten request for less talking and more cowbell.
Pretty sure he’s already miserable. I mean.. he lives in a country where Democrats also live and where people who don’t know how to please their own wives think Bruce Springsteen’s opinion matters. Too much tofu, not enough culling stupid people.
LMAO!
❤️
Time to BudLite this conceited asshole just another woke big mouth that fills his own pockets with our money. Just another privilege big mouth with his head up democrats asses.
You are a disgrace to our country. You don’t have to agree with any political policy or person, but if you love this country you should be grateful to be an American. 🇺🇲 Whoever is in the Whitehouse deserves to be respected by everyone from both party’s. This country made you famous and wealthy! Try doing that in another country with the hatred you show to all patriots in America 🇺🇸
I totally agree with Sue
Bruce Sprungstein needs to shut up, he is really going to lose the remaining brain cells when republicans take the election in November, the only people who listen to such an untalented clown is uneducated slobs.
Shut up and sing!
Bruce who????? Your light has dimmed a longggg time ago!!! Play music and keep out of politics!!!
Sounds like to me he shouldn’t go buy the boss, but instead be the PUPPET!! SHOUT OUT LOUD.
He makes us all miserable.
Who no is this girl name Bruce? I thought that was a male name. Guess times are changing because now I don’t know if this thing is a female or male. Does he play in the WNBA now? Wow!
Bruce Springsteen wants Congress to make President Trump miserable. In other words, a do-nothing Congress–Springsteen’s gift to America.