In a move that has stunned federal employees and party planners alike, USAID has shut down its headquarters indefinitely after a controversial decision related to Elon Musk’s inability to attend what insiders have dubbed “the greatest parties of the year,” sources have confirmed.
The reason for his absence? Musk was busy cleaning out skeletons in the closets at USAID HQ.
Apparently, Musk’s weekend activities, which he described as “a bit of tidying up of outdated policies and spooky old skeletons,” caused such a stir that the agency’s leadership felt they had no choice but to close doors temporarily. “It’s not every day that you find a billionaire in your broom closet, reorganizing more than just cleaning supplies,” quipped one senior official.
This unexpected spring cleaning by Musk left little room for the usual revelry and socializing that characterized the agency’s famed weekend gatherings. The decision to exclude Musk from the party scene while he conducted his unorthodox audit led to low morale and even lower attendance.
As of press time, a group of interns was seen drafting a new inclusion policy titled “All Billionaires Are Party Worthy, Especially When They’re Also Ghostbusters,” in hopes of getting USAID’s doors—and dance floors—back open.
Elon has become righteous, scary dude! He is like some nerd super hero settings right for the common sense team. We shall call him Muskolm X
About time somebody had the balls to clean up this theft of taxpayer money calling it what it really is at this point…theft and lining of pockets. Go MUSK.
You do realize that musk was not elected to get involved in our nation’s finances. He has no business or authority to have access to our government’s financial information. The Musk/trump administration wants to use these funds to pay for trump’s billionl dollar tax cuts for his billionaire buddies.
He was appointed by the President to look into wasteful spending. I believe he will uncover gazillions!
I think you are right, Barbara.
Neither was the the USAID office elected yet they are the ones stealing taxpayers money from the people of America and sending it to woke programs while our people are living in tents and going hungry
I think they should inform the American people
twice a week of the incredibly stupid and massive
amounts of money the government wastes and the ridiculous things they waste it on. And if the main stream media had any integrity whatsoever they should be truthful and tell their sheep what is really going on. Not much chance of that unfortunately. 36 TRILLION IN DEBT!!!!! WTF !!!!
its like trump and team are trimming tons of fat off of a bloated political pork monster.