LOS ANGELES — Hollywood elites reportedly launched a desperate push for federal tax credits this week, asking taxpayers to rescue the same entertainment industry that has spent decades calling them racist, ignorant, backward, dangerous, and too dumb to understand a 47-minute superhero movie about climate grief, sources have confirmed.
Studio executives insisted the request was not hypocrisy, but “inclusive corporate welfare for people with better opinions.”
“We believe the rich should pay their fair share,” said one producer from inside a Malibu estate with a meditation room for rescue crystals.
“Unless the rich are actors, directors, streamers, studio heads, or anyone currently developing a limited series about how awful regular Americans are.”
Hollywood leaders explained that tax credits are necessary because audiences have stopped paying to watch movies where every villain is a Republican, every hero gives a TED Talk, and the third act is just a woman staring into rain while forgiving capitalism.
Critics asked why the “ignorant” half of America should fund an industry that openly hates them.
“That’s exactly the kind of question an ignorant taxpayer would ask,” said one studio consultant.
“Now please write the check.”
California officials proposed alternatives, including asking Gavin Newsom to buy another warehouse full of his own memoirs, but economists warned even that would only cover three diversity consultants and half a Netflix reboot nobody wanted.
As of press time, Hollywood had clarified that taxing the rich remains essential, unless the rich are famous, fragile, union-approved, and currently begging truck drivers in Ohio to subsidize their next anti-America awards speech.
Sounds about right…..
Hollywood, the land of geniuses that cannot figure out why half their fan base have bailed out of their counter common sense revolution. Turns out that almost nobody wants to watch a DEI actor perform propaganda. Turns out that years of failed law fare and character assassination is a plot that does not hold up.
Well said Hans, these elitists think that they can lord it over the common sense folks that make up more than half of our country! So now they’re not making the $$$! You can’t utilize a bridge that you already burnt down! Hollywood is drying up (dying) because they are all WOKE!!! They are a bunch of hypocrites! Mel Foote, Ret. TSgt, USAF
I am laughing at these Hollyweird people. Who fake their characters in movies and think the public really think they are special.
Give me a break and so tired of these fake people of whining. So tired of these type of people.
GYSgt. USMC
I have not gone to a movie theater in years and I used to love “The Big Screen”. After all the self indulgent crap spewed by people who have rarely if ever contributed to anyone’s welfare (unless it was highly publicized), can stop wondering why they’re losing millions in revenue. All these arrogant narcissistic entertainers – including professional athletes and the sports teams they play for can all go pound sand! I was raised in the Green Bay, WI area and I wouldn’t attend a professional football game unless you payed me. Same goes for the big screen movie theaters. All over priced nonsense spewed by people who’s moral compass is so warped it’s a wonder they can navigate their way from the parking lot! Assholes ALL!