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Home World News

Iran’s Economy Sizzles: Rials Better Burned Than Spent

J.K. Around by J.K. Around
April 5, 2025
in World News
2
Iranian cash up in flames
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In a stunning turn of events, Iran’s rial has reportedly become more valuable as kindling than currency, as ongoing sanctions take their toll on the nation’s economy, sources have confirmed.

The Iranian government, in an attempt to salvage national pride and provide some form of heating during the cold months, has begun encouraging citizens to stockpile their now worthless rials for winter fires.



Once seen as a symbol of Iran’s sovereign pride, the rial has plummeted in value, leaving many to joke that it burns longer than it spends. “At least it keeps us warm,” remarked one Tehran shopkeeper, while tossing another bundle of bills into his stove. The situation has become so dire that a new app “Find My Rial’s Worth” has gone viral, with users comparing how much heat their savings can generate compared to traditional firewood.

As the international community watches the unintended consequence of the sanctions unfold, Iran’s Central Bank has started issuing savings certificates that double as fire starters. Creative solutions or desperate measures? You decide.

As of press time, entrepreneurs in Tehran have started workshops on converting savings accounts into fire logs, promising a warm and bright future, quite literally.

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Comments 2

  1. Joe American says:
    3 months ago

    Called crash and burn. Lolp

    Reply
  2. GSM says:
    3 months ago

    Only the worse kind of braindead fool can’t see we are in a war. And the shots are going to be fired on our soil by our own people ! Obama gave us a Nuclear Armed Iran .Those running Iran are not Iranians His hatred for white people stems from his whore white mother and his relatives the Bush’s . He gave Iran a plane load of unmarked Bills to continue to develop a nuclear bomb of which they say they have many located all over America. So folks we paid for our own deaths . With the morons who put the half Black illegal into office.Only the dumbest among us Listens to him . Iran funds Hamas and every terrorist. Hamas is the protesting fools new buddy so get ready for their brand of evil . They like rape the mother while they raped and used their hands to choke two babies to death in front of her After they raped them they cut them into pieces in front of her . Yeah that happened.
    And we have thousands of fools being led .By their planted people to destroy America.
    Only fools protest in our schools And the democrats are committing treason And should be executed
    Ask the fools who sit in profound stupidity Where do you go when you destroy America. Your new friends like to rape and slice you up and put a gun in your vagina blowing your head off. These are the same people that mutilated Saul And his sons David had to recover their dead bodies.
    If this is the educated among us.
    Then the uneducated know a lot more than they do.

    Reply

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