In a bold move to curb crime, California’s Democrat leadership has mandated locking up shampoo bottles in stores, claiming it prevents thieves from “slipping into a life of crime”, sources have confirmed.
Governor Newsom hailed the policy as “revolutionary,” arguing that securing toiletries behind plexiglass saves potential criminals from temptation.
“No shampoo, no crime spree—it’s simple math,” Newsom declared at a San Francisco Walgreens, where shoppers now need ID to buy conditioner.
Retailers report skyrocketing costs for lockboxes, while customers grumble about 20-minute waits for soap.
Critics, including local sheriffs, call it “absurd,” noting actual criminals remain free while shampoo is caged. Still, progressive activists praise the move, insisting it’s “restorative justice for haircare.”
Some stores have even hired “shampoo escorts” to monitor aisles. Republicans mock the policy, with one state senator quipping, “Next, they’ll arrest toothpaste for aiding cavities.”
Democrats defend the locks as a “compassionate” deterrent, vowing to expand to deodorant next.
As of press time, Newsom was spotted pitching a reality show, Locked Up Luxuries, to fund the initiative.
R I D I C U L O U S !!! The extreme left lost all sense of ridiculous, not only in the US, but all over the world. Instead of punishing the bad guys, the State punishes the honest people. In Brazil, a 34 y.o. Mother was sentenced to 14 years in prison for writing a phrase on the basis of a statue. Meanwhile, a drug dealer arrested with close to 1 ton of cocaine was released upon arrest, and the drug returned to him. Police tried to charge him with possession of a gun restricted to Armed Forces. But the Judge ruled that the gun was his working tool, that he had a dangerous job, and used the gun for self protection. The irregular gun was also returned to him. That’s the extreme left: punish the honest and reward the criminal.
This all stems from the fact We the people have sat back and let the insane rule . We do have the power Not the pinkies in pussy hats !
When a few rule millions of people !
There’s the absurdity of it all . Bullies need their buttes kicked Judges should be removed ! Politicians well ! The firing squad should be revised . And Americans at least the ones that are still whole Americans and not genderless or claim other nations while enjoying the freedoms white people died to get . Better rise !!
Yes White people!!!!! A Revolutionary War !
And there used to be black people that fought for America . It was their home until Idiots started using them to destroy it ! Now they just take And the idiots in DC gave America away to the rest of the world . It’s sad when people can break our laws and are treated like kings and queens. While Americans die in the streets! You think it was a well thought out plan to murder Americans by Americans?
Keep allowing fools like Newsom to return to positions They think they own .
All of you had better hope that Trump can at least Get some of our industry back . That thing that Americans had to create our own goods .
I guess China will walk in and take over America!
Why ! Because we have too many fools giving what little is left to terrorists and themselves .