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Olympian’s Powdery Stunt Sparks $10 Million Manhunt

Joe King by Joe King
March 6, 2025
in Sports
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Snowboarding in Vail
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In a bizarre twist that blurs the lines between extreme sports and extreme lawbreaking, former Canadian Olympic snowboarder Ryan Wedding was reportedly seen snowboarding through powder suspiciously resembling cocaine on the slopes of Vail, Colorado, sources have confirmed.

Known for his audacious stunts, Wedding seems to have taken his thrill-seeking to new, illegal heights, reportedly leaving behind a literal white trail of evidence.



This “snowy escapade” has caught the eye of U.S. authorities, leading Secretary of State Marco Rubio to approve a staggering $10 million reward for Wedding’s capture. “We can’t let anyone, no matter how athletic, carve through international drug laws like they’re fresh Colorado powder,” Rubio stated, seemingly bemused yet stern about the hefty bounty on a former Olympian.

Wedding, who has been ‘running figure 8’s around the law’ for years, according to DEA officials, seems to have turned his Olympic evasion techniques into a method for dodging law enforcement. The situation has led to a flurry of memes and snowy puns across social media, turning Wedding into an unlikely folk hero for some and a fugitive for others.

As of press time, local skiers were advised to watch out for flying cash, as bounty hunters on skis might soon hit the slopes in pursuit of the rogue snowboarder.

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Comments 2

  1. Gloria says:
    4 months ago

    We can’t allow celebrities to break the law, using there fame to get thru customs.

    Reply
  2. GSM says:
    4 months ago

    The FBI needs to Look under Hunter the pedo pervert. Looks like Hunter might have had him hid in the White House. His supply came from someone. No wonder they couldn’t tell whose fingerprints were all over the place. Pedos and thieves are 99% druggies . Look at every insane politician! No doubt Magoo was high too ! Those who live off of Americans always pay with our money.
    Why do you think Zelensky made all those visits That crackhead is Hunters ally. Remember Hunters Ukraine fiasco . Zelensky got Billions and his drugs.This guy probably had a place to hide along with Hunter . Remember Biden hid Hunter from the law Our house !
    Look no further.

    Reply

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