Gymnastics legend Mary Lou Retton, 57, stunned West Virginia State Police today by performing a full floor routine during a traffic stop on I-64 near Charleston, after being pulled over for speeding, sources have confirmed.
Retton, the 1984 Olympic gold medalist, allegedly exited her vehicle, dropped into a split, and executed a series of cartwheels and backflips, declaring, “This is how I handle citations!”
Officers, baffled, cited her for reckless driving but let her off with a warning after she stuck the landing. Conservatives on X cheered, with one user quipping, “Retton’s flipping out on Biden’s roads!”
Trump, on Truth Social, praised her, saying, “Mary Lou’s got more energy than Sleepy Joe!”
The right hailed her as a “patriot gymnast,” while liberals called the stunt “irresponsible.”
Retton, unapologetic, told local news, “I’m still a winner!”
As of press time, Retton was reportedly training for a “Traffic Stop Tumbling” event at the 2028 Olympics.
A dead frog has more energy than sleepy Joe Bidet
A dead frog has more energy than sleepy Joe Bidet