Megan Rapinoe defended her Anything Goes Cup Sunday, explaining that because athletes aren’t equally talented, organizers might as well stop sorting out who competes against whom, sources have confirmed.
A coach suggested that “sports aren’t fair” traditionally meant somebody practiced while you were hitting snooze.
Rapinoe requested a more inclusive alarm clock.
“Susie trained for ten years,” he continued.
“The point was to improve her game, not surprise her with a different competition.”
Officials dismissed him for bringing coaching into sports.
Rapinoe argued that natural advantages already existed.
A tournament director nodded, then entered a forklift in the high jump.
“That isn’t what I meant.”
“Excellent. We’ve discovered categories.”
The forklift cleared eight feet and received a shoe endorsement.
A reporter asked whether acknowledging unequal talent automatically settled every eligibility question.
Rapinoe called for nuance.
The reporter checked the schedule. Nuance apparently began immediately after the forklift won.
Meanwhile, organizers replaced the women’s soccer final with whoever could move the goalposts fastest.
Rapinoe qualified comfortably.
Her opponent spent the afternoon training, studying tactics, and improving her conditioning.
Judges awarded Rapinoe three goals for explaining why keeping score was problematic.
Then they gave the trophy to the forklift.
As of press time, Rapinoe had demanded officials distinguish between accepting life’s unfairness and designing a competition that made winning impossible for her.


Rapinoe fails logic, making her a Loser.
Absolutely correct. Big time CLUELESS LOSER !!!
She is trying so hard to be relevant and most people have no idea who she is.
I wonder if Megan would like to have played against men who pretend to be women. Her tune probably would have changed as she left the field on a stretcher.
Megan Rapinoe and Meghan Markle seem to have several things in common.
1. Both of them are named Megan- albeit with different spellings.
2. Both of them are clueless losers.
3. Both of them are whiny cry babies.
4. Both of them need to shut up and go away- forever. And the sooner the better!
Tapinoe I mean Rapinoe knows better she’s manipulating nonsense just to back her narrative on men should play women sports. Rapinoe wouldn’t fit in today’s game. Rapinoe knows this and is trying to stay relevant in the game.
Ah, the angry, purple-headed guy. She whines about women not making the same as men and then forgets a few key points. The first is that men’s sports make money, women’s do not. E.g., the WNBA; it is subsidized by the NBA, yeah, Meg, men’s b-ball. She also never mentions that the WNT was beaten something like 5-1 by a boys U-15 team. This was not an All-Star team, nor a championship team. It was just a bunch of 12-14 year-old boys. Chew on that for a while, Meggo. Let women play against women and men against men.
Can you imagine how loud the little guy would get if men were allowed to compete against women? She’d howl about the unfairness of it all. Once a victim, always a victim.