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CAPITOL CAFETERIA CHAOS: Schiff Goes Limp as Trump Brings Potential Peace

Joe King by Joe King
August 16, 2025
in U.S. News
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WASHINGTON, D.C. — Panic spread through Democratic headquarters yesterday after President Trump’s summit with Vladimir Putin in Alaska ended not in global meltdown, but in something far worse for the left: success.

Both leaders called the meeting “positive,” sending Adam Schiff into such a spiral that janitors had to peel him off the Capitol cafeteria floor after he fainted into a plate of tofu nuggets.



Once off the floor, “Trump’s being manipulated!” Schiff wailed, while staffers nodded politely and opened a betting pool on how many times he’d say “Russia” before lunchtime (answer: 43).

At one point, Schiff whispered under his breath, “I can’t believe he did it,” before launching back into full woke tantrum mode — stomping his feet, flapping his arms, and yelling “It’s not fair! He was supposed to fail!” like a kid denied extra recess.

Analysts suggest Schiff’s real fear isn’t Putin manipulating President Trump, but Trump actually bringing home potential peace and stability — the kind of boring competence that makes cable pundits unemployed.

Meanwhile, Democrats scrambled for a counter-narrative.

AOC proposed calling peace “toxic masculinity without bombs.”

Pelosi demanded Trump be indicted immediately, declaring, “We can’t have him trying to provoke peace — it doesn’t fit with our agenda!”

As of press time, Schiff was seen frantically drafting articles of impeachment against “positive vibes,” while woke protesters outside demanded NATO replace the military with a global kazoo orchestra.

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Comments 6

  1. GSM says:
    9 months ago

    Like everyone else . I too don’t think there will ever be any accountability for the democrats/swamp crimes . Especially this one . Democrats never pay ! He comes from the perverted California crowd ! They steal and kill . Remember they never leave DC ! Even when they die they linger around the fringes of DC forever!
    This man is a known homosexual . It is well known throughout his career that little boys are his choice. And in LA there is a place called Cabin in the woods where this man as well as thousands of other well knowns take their prey . To Be out of prying eyes !
    If it’s still available. Look up the Democrat Hydra . There is his shocking lifestyle . And what he has done is beyond belief. You would get the death penalty .
    One thing for sure . His victims are young and many . And it appears if there is ever justice for them . It will The God of Heaven . Taking care of him .

    Reply
    • David Williams says:
      9 months ago

      Yes, God will send all of these America-hating COMMUNIST DEMOCRAPS to a place that will be much hotter than their rhetoric ever was! It doesn’t matter that they DON’T believe in God, that isn’t going to change anything on their end! You reap what you sow, says the Bible!

      Reply
    • Mother Guest says:
      9 months ago

      Schiff is so theatrical, I guess that stems from living in Hollywierd, CA! He knows they have the goods on him. I have been reading a ton about it. He is GOING DOWN! He must be held accountable for what HE has done to TRUMP, even before he was elected! HE MUST PAY THE PRICE FOR HIS ARROGANCE IN THINKING HE COULD GET AWAY WITH IT ALL! He is crooked, sold out to China. $47 Million to his family.

      Reply
      • MariJo says:
        9 months ago

        Absolutely Schiff is a despicable piece of humanity and a Pathological Liar and a disgrace to these DEMORATS. HE.HAS BEEN LYONG ABOUT TRUMP.10 PLUS YEARS ALL FABRICATED IN HIS OWN DISGRACEFUL.MIKD
        .HE NEEDS TO BE CHARGED AND THEN ARRESTED FIR H8S CRIMES AND CORRUPTION
        HE.IS THE WORST.OF THE WORST. AND HOPEFULLY.HE GETS WHSTHE DESERVES.

        Reply
  2. Beverly Soltwedel says:
    9 months ago

    The stupidity of the Dumocrats are once again shining bright. I really do not understand how those ridiculously stupid people can open their mouths. The Dumocratic party is the laughing stock of the USA

    Reply
  3. Sue says:
    9 months ago

    Schiff don’t worry Bubba won’t go limp like you. Why is Schiff still sitting on his government throne chair when he should be sitting on Bubbas lap. He belongs in prison immediately.

    Reply

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