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Home U.S. News

Democrats Furious After Criminals Lose “Right to Be Caught and Released” Back Behind Best Buy

J.K. Around by J.K. Around
August 25, 2025
in U.S. News
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Democrats are in full meltdown mode after President Trump announced the end of their cherished catch-and-release program, which was reportedly lifted straight out of the Department of Natural Resources’ fishery handbook, sources have confirmed.

Instead of trout, however, this program specialized in catching and releasing repeat offenders back into the streets of D.C. so they could “thrive in their natural habitat.”



Trump, ruining the fun, told reporters, “These are criminals, not trout.

You don’t slap a GoPro on a burglar and release him back behind Best Buy.”

“Woke” leftist were quick to defend the practice.

“They’re only stealing flat screens to experience the American Dream, same as anyone else,” shouted one lawmaker while angrily clutching a Starbucks cup.

Another added, “Most violent offenders are just expressing their truth because they never got Build-A-Bear birthday parties as kids.”

A third proposed a compromise where criminals could be released with “safe spaces” painted on sidewalks, so they’d know where it’s socially acceptable to assault pedestrians.

Civil rights activists have already rebranded the policy as “Catch, Kiss, and Release,” insisting each arrest should come with a hug, a snack pack, and a gas card.

As of press time, Democrats were seen drafting new legislation to provide every repeat offender with a free emotional-support raccoon and a $200 stipend for ski masks.

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Comments 4

  1. Loose Moose says:
    2 months ago

    Liberals will never learn that coddling criminals raises the cost of goods and services for everyone. Stores in California have closed due to rampant theft and then the left complains that the businesses are not serving the pubic.

    Reply
    • Charlotte Teitelbaum says:
      2 months ago

      It also encourages people to steal, assault people and murder. No accountability encourages bad behavior

      Reply
  2. Pia says:
    2 months ago

    To quote the “Peanuts” character Charlie Brown = Good Grief! ….. But congrats to Dems: they’ve discovered a new depth of stupidity.

    Reply
  3. GSM says:
    2 months ago

    I am nearly 80 and totally blown away by the idiots who are old as I am.Trying to Kill and hurt Americans over illegal terrorists While our people are starving and our vets and children being destroyed by the elected morons who use them as fools to kill the rest of us My generation were patriotic and did watch government closely. But this same group are the old white hippies that gave us socialism and Hanoi Jane And Kerry And Songbird McCain . And this treason Democratic Party . While the coward rapist who fled to Russia and raped his way through 2 terms became President . It is this group of Elderly that sits in our chambers for over 50 years that got rich while killing 58,000 drafted Americans Who never held a job in their lives Like Bernie Sanders. The only hippie that the hippies through out of the commune for. Being too lazy to clean up after himself . Hippies has practiced so much sex they died from every known sexual disease. And drug addicts. These old people now embrace illegals over their own people.
    But we all must remember These old hippies are the ones who are sitting in front of the boob tube more than any other group being propagandized by those who want them dead. Remember a cured person I s no longer a patient Mentally and physically.
    Satan And his children uses the fools among us

    Reply

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