LOS ANGELES, CA — Mayor Karen Bass unveiled a revolutionary food-safety policy Friday allowing unpermitted street vendors to skip inspections, licensing, and several other outdated concepts traditionally associated with not poisoning customers, sources have confirmed.
City Hall immediately launched Sam & Ella’s Sidewalk Dining Experience, named after two entrepreneurs nobody should pronounce too quickly.
Licensed restaurant owners were confused.
“I pay rent, insurance, permits, taxes, refrigeration costs, and inspection fees,” one chef said.
“What do they pay?”
“Community vibes,” an aide replied.
Bass reportedly defended the vendors as an essential part of Los Angeles culture while avoiding repeated questions about whether she had personally tried Tony’s Shopping Cart Burgers, served medium-rare after spending four hours beside a freeway.
Officials insisted health inspections disproportionately burden people selling food.
The Health Department briefly objected before remembering who signs things.
City consultants then proposed replacing health grades with feelings.
A: Delicious.
B: Probably fine.
C: Build immunity.
Meanwhile, legal restaurants began rolling their kitchens onto sidewalks to qualify for the new regulatory system.
As of press time, Los Angeles had solved unequal enforcement by making the rules increasingly difficult to locate.
I am so glad I live in Newport Beach and most of the people here are Republicans. Bass is a joke and a cheater, there is no way in hell she gained that many votes in such a short time. She learned at a young age g she when she went to Cuba to learn about socialism. LA is a shithole that Bass and Democrats have created.
Well, that is certainly one way to reduce the population in that area
I am so surprised at this, said no one! It is the stupidest, most dangerous thing they have done yet!
So along with all the feces and piss in the streets and on the sidewalks, she can now add all of the puke from people getting sick from uninspected food.She will create a pandemic just as Mon Kempf Fauci did. The Venders can then start selling Basses homemade manufactured Soylent Green from the people dropping dead in the street. These commie politicians in Cuntfornia are bat fucking crazy.