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Home Politics

Mamdani Denies Being a Communist, Accidentally Announces Communism Anyway

J.K. Around by J.K. Around
October 6, 2025
in Politics
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In what experts are calling “the boldest theft since the IRS discovered Venmo,” Zohran Mamdani has proposed The People’s Reallocation Initiative, a program designed to “redistribute wealth, joy, and household pets for total fairness,” sources have confirmed.

According to leaked documents, the plan would automatically transfer 80% of citizens’ bank balances into a communal account labeled “Feelings Fund,” managed by a subcommittee of sociology majors and vegan influencers.



The remaining 20% would be invested in emotional support banners reminding taxpayers, “You Didn’t Build That, We Did.”

When asked if this was a step toward communism, Mamdani denied the accusation, insisting he’s “absolutely not a communist” — though critics note that in Mamdani’s world, everything from the economy to your lunch plans seems more and more like that Taylor Swift hit: “RED.”

Early trials reportedly included “shared refrigerators,” “community Wi-Fi for people without routers,” and a housing concept known only as “Your Neighbor’s House.”

Republicans have countered with an alternative bill called “Work For It 2.0.”

As of press time, sources confirm Mamdani’s team was drafting a follow-up proposal titled The People’s Rebranding Act, where socialism will officially be called “collective compassion,” and all dissenting opinions will be repossessed for equity.

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Comments 4

  1. Nunya says:
    2 months ago

    Mistake? Ought to make one think a bit straighter about their vote.

    Reply
  2. AJB says:
    2 months ago

    Citizens Bank? Who’s money is he taking exactly?
    Vote CUOMO THE SANE SMART CHOICE!

    Reply
    • Eugene Kazmier says:
      2 months ago

      Is it the sane smart choice? is it really. More of the same baloney from the man that let criminals roam free, killed nursing home patients, refused help for people because it came from trump. You people deserve Mamdani because you were fine with De Blasio, Adams and Cuomo for Gov and now Hochul. New Yorkers deserve what they get.

      Reply
  3. Rita says:
    2 months ago

    This country is upside down. Wake up democrats or it might be too late. By the way, I never say the democratic party because they are not democratic. We need to be calling it the democrat party, which is what rush Limbaugh posted out.

    Reply

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