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Home Politics

New Kamala Harris Economic Plan Will See Newborn Babies Receive Large Sack of Cash

Joe King by Joe King
August 19, 2024
in Politics
20
New Kamala Harris Economic Plan Will See Newborn Babies Receive Large Sack of Cash
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Presidential hopeful Kamala Harris has started to unveil some of her campaign promises, and a particularly controversial one involves handing newborn babies a sack of four or five thousand dollars, sources have confirmed. 

“Just give ‘em the money, we’ll figure out how it works later,” said Harris, outlining her plan to rapturous applause from gathered democratic voters. “Children are the future, and I want our children to know that their future will involve a lot of handouts if they play their cards right. At least if we are able to take the White House in November, that is!”

Critics of Harris slammed her proposal as irresponsible spending.

“This doesn’t make sense at all,” said local full-time worker Justin King. “So I still have to pay out of pocket for my dental work because my medical insurance doesn’t cover the bones in my mouth, but we’re giving newborn thousands of dollars like they got second place on Jeopardy? What is happening?!”

As of press time, Democrats introduced a bill that would also give newborn babies in democratic families the right to vote.

Tags: electionharriskamala harrisWhite House
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Comments 20

  1. Anthony Iannozzi says:
    9 months ago

    So if the baby can make it to birth, it’s pay time.

    Reply
    • Gary Brown says:
      9 months ago

      Even though this is a satire site, and not real; if it was, the abortion industry would dissolve …….. unless they could figure a way to kill the kid after the payout (I wouldn’t put it past them).

      Reply
      • Dakotahjoe says:
        9 months ago

        Because all pro-choice folks are ruthless murders, willing to kill children and old people.

        Reply
        • Festus says:
          9 months ago

          Not all. Just the ones that do it. You freaking idiot.

          Reply
  2. CE Holley says:
    9 months ago

    Where are they going to get the money? We are trillions of dollars in debt. Who will decide the money? Another payoff for votes without any idea of the impact to everyone here or long term consequences.

    Reply
    • Gary Brown says:
      9 months ago

      Please get a clue! This is a satire site! This is not real! I can’t believe how many people on here think this is real news. Use your brain, folks; come on………. the author of every article on this site is JOE KING…. JOKING! Get it? I imagine you must be living in your mommy’s basement.

      Reply
      • Howard Siggelko says:
        9 months ago

        Her plan does call for giving thousands for newborns…

        Reply
      • 2004done says:
        9 months ago

        Gary Brown (satire site?): When Trump gets impeached for this again and again, you’ll realize: with the TDS in the New York City Judicial System, NOTHING IS SATIRE !!!!

        Reply
    • Phil Simpson says:
      9 months ago

      C’mon man, just print some more dollars just like they do now.

      Reply
    • Bazooka Bob says:
      9 months ago

      Where you ask? Easy, just print it like they’ve always done which makes the money you work for that much more worthless.

      Reply
  3. Dennis says:
    9 months ago

    Some of the dumbest shite I’ve ever heard. Then, then she says that children can receive HAND OUTS throughout IF THEY PLAY THEIR CARDS RIGHT. WTF KK?

    Reply
    • Gary Brown says:
      9 months ago

      Calm down Dennis; this is a satire site. It is not real, after all every article on here is written by “JOE KING”! Get it now? JOKING! I can’t believe so many people believe whatever they see on the internet; get a clue!

      Reply
      • Dakotahjoe says:
        9 months ago

        These people do. They vote also. Scary, huh!

        Reply
        • Festus says:
          9 months ago

          And pro choice people don’t allow infants to be sucked from their wombs and sold for parts or flushed down toilets. If it’s your body, your choice why are leftists upset with stormy danials making a few bucks? Most dumb common this site are written by democrats, because they do believe everything on the msm and internet

          Reply
  4. Purple sky says:
    9 months ago

    Satire but with the history of this clown show in the white house it probably isn’t too far from another promise(BRIBE) the Democommies would try and do.

    Reply
  5. 3Xe1ioaiNITxtqNW5CaZEzpxpY4ggtEQJVxO4x0v98I= says:
    9 months ago

    another democrat vote BUYING scheme
    not going to happen no money to but maybe money FOR
    maybe they need a full term baby to experiment on
    and is it going to come OUT OF HER pocketbook or taxpayers again

    Reply
  6. Meow Mommy says:
    9 months ago

    Remember, these are the same people believing this that will vote for Camel! Bet the author gets a kick reading the responses! Even if it wasn’t satire imagine believing the left allowing babies to make it to full term. At least America babies. They’ll “allow” illegals to be born. Rebuilding America on illegals!

    Reply
  7. Gerald says:
    9 months ago

    I can see an increase in births just to get the money. I hope and pray she loses big time.

    Reply
  8. Carol Shearin says:
    9 months ago

    How many ruthless people will have babies just to get the money. People who might not even care for the child.

    Reply
    • 2004done says:
      9 months ago

      I’m a toothless old guy that (miracle of miacles) just got pregnant, send me MY F-ing CHECK so I can buy myself some baby food!!!!

      Reply

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