ANNAPOLIS: Governor Wes Moore condemned election interference while feeding Maryland through a congressional Play-Doh machine that separated Democrats from everyone needing swimming lessons, sources have confirmed.
“Trump cannot manipulate elections!” shouted Moore, squeezing Annapolis into a noodle and wrapping it around a Republican dentist.
The dispute concerned a fictional Alaska race featuring two candidates with identical names.
Trump requested an investigation after both answered when somebody yelled, “Hey, you!”
Moore called that unconstitutional, then erased a Maryland cul-de-sac for voting incorrectly.
“They’re still residents,” an aide assured reporters.
“Just electorally offshore.”
His new map featured one district shaped like a blue donkey swallowing another district.
“Communities belong together,” Moore explained, connecting two Democratic households with a congressional zip line.
A Republican homeowner complained his property had been divided.
“Your house is fine,” Moore replied.
“We only annexed your wife’s opinion.”
Staff warned that the deadline had passed.
Moore drew a clock with thirteen Tuesdays.
“Fixed.”
The administration subsequently appointed a box of crayons to oversee election integrity.
Red was immediately recused.
Asked why Democrats needed such elaborate boundaries, Moore demonstrated by shaking an Etch A Sketch until a Republican disappeared.
As of press time, Moore declared his map fair after giving Republicans their own district: a waterproof ballot box strapped to a confused crab
Democrats like to expose their lunacy.
Wes Moore is an idiot. Government as usual has too much control! This needs to stop, I would clearly call this cheating and a redefining of our voting rights. A socialist move empowered by someone controlled by an elite bunch of assholes!!
Everyone should just take a step back and compare all of these SEVERE left leaning politician’s, such to the likes of El Sayed, Mamdani, ocasio Cortez, Nixon, and so on. You will see the same form of smooth speeches coming out of them. Then compare there pasts. And you will see the TRUTH. Pretty packages dont always deliver pretty results.