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Home U.S. News

“Christie: NYC Only Clean Where Cameras Exist”

Joe King by Joe King
February 9, 2026
in U.S. News
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Former New Jersey Governor Chris Christie revealed that New York City’s sanitation apparatus appears to function like a private concierge service for Mayor Zohran Mamdani’s front door while treating the rest of the five boroughs like an experimental landfill, sources have confirmed.

Weeks after the snowfall, entire neighborhoods still resembled frozen landfills, while one very specific stretch of Manhattan gleamed like a gated resort.



According to insiders, fleets of “Press-Ready Cleanliness Units” — equipped with gold-plated brooms, aesthetic snow plows, and cinematic mood lighting — formed a gleaming halo around Gracie Mansion, scrubbing every curb to a mirror shine.

One block beyond the camera’s frame, however, trucks allegedly turned around, declaring the rest of the city “beyond the scope of optics.”

Mamdani reportedly defended the disparity as “hyper-localized equity,” rebranding snowbanks and trash piles as “intentional urban texture.”

City planners unveiled glossy renderings of “Sustainable Co-Living,” luxury roach condos complete with artisanal rat tracks and compost aromatherapy.

Standing beside a playground buried under a glacier of garbage, Christie quipped, “Here’s the thing — rats love trash.

Clearing the snow while letting trash stack to the moon is like plowing a runway for a squadron of jet-fueled raccoons.”

Sanitation workers were then instructed to sweep only when a drone was overhead, while residents in outer boroughs were told to treat neglect as “restorative character-building.”

As of press time, 2029 mayoral hopeful Michael Rappaport and fellow New Yorkers were pooling donations to buy the city a broom that works without a camera crew.

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Comments 5

  1. Joe Modarots says:
    2 months ago

    You vote in an Islamist/Marxist supremest who has an ax to grind against Whites, Jews , Christians and Capitalists and what the heck did you expect ?

    Reply
  2. Scooter60 says:
    2 months ago

    If I lived in New York, I’d be dumping my garbage in front of Gracie Mansion. I don’t understand why New Yorkers aren’t actually doing that very thing. Maybe then the Mayor would do something. LOL

    Reply
  3. Sue says:
    2 months ago

    Well this is how muslims live in sh-t holes you got what you voted for and you got this camel
    f-cker for 4 years are you happy now who you voted for. How is your free busses working out for you and is his grocery store filled with really cheap food like he said he was going to do. Wait till every government official hired is a muslim NYC the East Coast Cesspool and Hochul is also the biggest swamp creature the do nothing accomplished nothing but destroyed NY useless POS. NY better wake up before it’s to late democrats want to destroy you so they have total power and control over you. You never learn democrats don’t give a sh- t about you just your money and power. Good luck with these two schmucks.

    Reply
  4. John F Gragowski says:
    2 months ago

    People think democrats are in favor of the little guy, in fact, they want to make everyone (but them) the little guy. Why anyone who can SEE not FEEL how things are can vote for them is beyond me.

    Reply
  5. Paul Taalman says:
    2 months ago

    I never thought I’d see the day when NYC would beat Canada to the bottom. Canada is on its way to having a Muslim Socialism ruin itself even more. We The North, their brains are frozen…

    Reply

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