Psychologists have been working around the clock to treat what they’re calling “Stage 5 Trump Derangement Syndrome” — a rare mental condition marked by involuntary tweeting and uncontrollable sneering whenever good news about President Trump surfaces, sources have confirmed.
Gavin Newsom’s most recent outbreak occurred just hours after a successful international hostage deal, when he reportedly grabbed his phone mid-hair-spray session to call Trump and Netanyahu “Dumb and Dumber.”
Experts say Newsom’s TDS episodes have become so frequent that his staff has installed padded walls in the governor’s social media room and a “Trump-free” safe zone scented with organic eucalyptus mist.
One aide, speaking under anonymity, said, “If Trump rescued puppies from a burning building, Newsom would still call it fascist.”
Some psychologists have noted eerie similarities between Newsom’s fixation and Rosie O’Donnell’s long-documented Trump obsession — both reportedly experience heart palpitations at the sound of “MAGA,” and both have been caught doomscrolling Truth Social at 3 a.m.
Doctors are now debating whether a simple “hard truth” session could help, or if Newsom should be admitted to a long-term facility specializing in political obsession recovery.
As of press time, Newsom was reportedly seen muttering “he ruins everything” into a kale smoothie while doomscrolling Trump’s latest poll numbers.
it’s not worth to comment on these Democrats. they have their head in their _ _ _. take it or leave.
Well said Ramon