Texas Democrat Jasmine Crockett stunned political observers this week after claiming Republicans somehow rigged her Democratic primary election by committing what experts are calling the most diabolical tactic imaginable: letting the election operate normally.
The controversy began after Crockett lost her primary race to James Talarico and immediately suggested that the real issue was the Texas courts’ refusal to dramatically rewrite election rules mid-vote in order to give her campaign additional time, additional ballots, and possibly a motivational speech.
“This is exactly what Republicans like to do,” Crockett reportedly told supporters. “They hide behind things like rules, procedures, and clocks.”
Legal scholars confirmed Crockett’s argument appears to center on the idea that democracy functions best when election laws remain flexible enough to change whenever a progressive candidate is having a slightly inconvenient evening.
Meanwhile critics online pointed out that Democrats spent the last several years explaining that voter ID laws, ballot security, and basic verification were oppressive relics of a darker era.
“But suddenly we need court intervention, recounts, extended hours, and maybe a do-over?” one confused voter reportedly asked.
Sources say Crockett briefly paused her accusations after campaign staff provided a snack, a restorative nap, and approximately three hours of therapeutic goat yoga.
As of press time, Crockett had graciously congratulated Talarico on his victory, confirming the election was completely fair once she finished processing it.
So…
Crocket says she lost her Democrat runoff because the Republicans were cheating ?
Does she even know what party she belongs to or what party her runoff was for ?
If anyone cheated her, I’m sure it was the Democrats because they knew that she was exactly who the Republicans wanted to run against !
Maybe she should have pulled something like Liz Warren did and claimed she was the great, great, great granddaughter of Davey Crocket ?!
Jasey, Jasey Crockett, Queen of the wild frontier !
It has a certain ring to it…
I like it !
“Queen of the Waffle House.”
Flavor Flav’s posse ? Lisa Lampanelli would like that one !
Poor Jasmine, go drink some tea and eat jasmine rice.
Now that’s rich. Democrats can’t even lose against their own party without accusing the Republicans of rigging elections. You can’t make this stuff up.
The gall to imagine Jazmine Crockett would raise herself up to such a level of importance, amazes me, a white supremacist by accusations of dimwits. God forbid this girl had ever gotten elected to carry out the trash. She is a perfect example why women of her caliber should never be elected to high office. She brings shame to her own gender. FUI white men and women comprised the majority that got Obama elected. You lost fair and square just like Trump did in 2020. Had he won he wouldn’t won in 24 and we wouldn’t know who to blame for the inconsistency of Joe and What’s Her Name. You lost Ms Crockett because of your attitude and your mouth. That’s on you.
…when your mouth is bigger than your brain…
Another complainer in the House.
About time this big mouth got what she deserved now she can start swinging a mop in the bathrooms and see her career circle the bowl and be flushed like the turd she is. On her way to the cesspool will be plenty more joining her. Her black DEI privilege came looking for her.
Maybe she should go have a beer and some great Texas barbecue sit down and shut up.
It’s sad that left wing ideology blocks the human mind from using reason to deal with difficulties. Then again, lefties choose it so whatever pain they feel is of their own making.
In other words, the election was supervised to ensure that votes were not counted multiple times, Americans only voted, no ballot harvesting was allowed, and no other cheating took place?
How dare they do something radical like following RULES!!! What a braindead radical racist!