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Home Politics

Visas Go VIP: $5 Million a Pop, Trump Announces

J.K. Around by J.K. Around
February 26, 2025
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In a move that’s shaking up immigration policy like a polaroid picture, President Trump has unveiled a plan to sell $5 million gold visas to immigrants wishing to enter the U.S., sources have confirmed.

This luxury lane for immigration, described as the “Platinum Plan” by the White House, aims to bring the best and the wealthiest to American shores.



“America is for sale, and it’s a buyer’s market,” Trump reportedly said, announcing the policy at a recent cabinet meeting filled with his entire committee. Critics are calling it the “Golden Door” policy, lamenting the overt commodification of American residency, while supporters applaud the move as a genius way to boost the economy and filter in ‘top-tier’ talent.

Responding to the news, Elon Musk, head of the Department of Government Efficiency (DOGE), quipped, “That’s all the kids and me do at DOGE, selling visas would be child’s play for us.”

As of press time, a line of luxury yachts was spotted off the coast of Miami, their wealthy occupants eagerly awaiting their $5 million entry tickets, while a new government website offering ‘Visas by Visa’ crashed from the overwhelming traffic.

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Comments 3

  1. Geraldine Burgess says:
    4 months ago

    I am not happy with the Presidents plan to sell 5 million gold visas to get rich people to America. I am waiting help for we retired and working Americans to get help with buying food, earning a living , paying rent/ homes. I am worried about my life savings ( not much) being “ stolen” from me ! Most of us are not any where near millionaires like those in Washington DC !!!

    Reply
  2. GSM says:
    4 months ago

    Folks it’s time to realize. We are watching a replay of the same crap we all were hoping would not ever see happen again ! Americans want all illegals gone Not just criminals . An not in jail .For is to continue to feed . This Includes the rich that will continue to hire those from India. And continue to control like they do now
    The tech companies took advantage of the fact the tinker bells in universities were only interested in protesting and destroying America . So while they were playing . And not watching . Tech hired nothing but foreigners for the positions that Americans were going to need after they got out of school with those high priced useless degrees. They hurt themselves because now they owe for those useless degrees And still have the burden of those illegals on their backs. And no job . Every Illegal cost each American thousands of dollars. This is another give away of our country. If it were just about rebuilding of our country .,Building what they took from us and gave to the rest of the world while loading billions of illegals into our economy. That would be great But sadly it’s the same story . Now they are not only screaming about illegals being only those that work in the fields .They are telling all of you that you are lazy and useless. And you will need to find a trade ( if there is one not being held by an Illegal) to survive being removed from the working class .Every politician is all for more illegals including Trump . Vivek insulted all of Americans. And he is not legal either . Ask if one person has yet to be charged with a crime. No ! It’s a shit show as usual., Oh Trump is giving us what he promised. But the courts that the democrats staked with idiots . Have people conned . Remember the hearings where the democrats rubber stamped over 235 judges right up until Trump took office . He said it would be revealed . But nothing about anybody ever being held accountable.
    Wake up ! We know what we all must do
    Democrats think they are our dictators and still are the scum of the earth And as usual Republicans are still stuck up their anus
    All while fools help murder over 69 million American babies.

    Reply
  3. William F Mann says:
    4 months ago

    Our immigration laws needs to be made easier for prospective immigrants to get into our country, not eliminated like the Biden’s administration, simply because Democrats aren’t willing to sit down with Republicans and discuss meaningful changes to the laws to give everyone one an equal change to gain entry to our country, not just allow the rich to buy their way in. Trump’s idea of selling gold Visas is a terrible idea and should not be implemented.

    Reply

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