Silicon Valley tech giants have announced a revolutionary new system to combat President Trump’s upcoming Voter ID executive order—an app called “BlueCheck+” that verifies your identity using pronouns, TikTok dances, and the number of oat milk lattes you’ve purchased this week, sources have confirmed.
According to the developers, IDs are “outdated colonial relics” and should be replaced with a more “inclusive” system where voters can upload a video of themselves crying during one of President Trump’s speeches.
For extra verification, the app cross-checks veterinary records to make sure Democrat pet owners have properly counted their cats, goldfish, and emotional support iguanas as registered voters.
Democrats praised the new method, saying it will “finally empower nonbinary raccoons and therapy turtles to vote without fear of oppression.”
Meanwhile, President Trump reportedly laughed so hard at the idea that it triggered a seismic wave of WOKE outrage all the way to New York City, where activists immediately held an emergency drum circle to heal their hurt feelings.
As of press time, California officials confirmed that anyone refusing to use BlueCheck+ will still be allowed to vote a second time, but only if they promise that they didn’t vote twice already.
Since Trump is getting rid of il Exactly what Americans voted him to do. And their base is being removed except for the university morons . I heard they were signing up rats and roaches . Giving them new SS numbers Especially since they gave ours to illegals . And Soros will be done away with So there goes their paid morons as well.
If the dead can vote . So can rays and roaches