Florida Democrats erupted in outrage this week after a charter boat captain was arrested for allegedly selling cocaine he claimed to have “found floating in the ocean,” calling the arrest a chilling escalation of President Trump’s authoritarian crusade against free range nautical narcotics, sources have confirmed
Progressive leaders immediately clarified the substance was not just cocaine but “unclaimed international powder,” which under modern left wing maritime law belongs to whoever finds it, labels it art, and resells it for social justice purposes.
“This man is a victim,” said one activist while nervously kicking a cooler into the water.
“Under Trump, even Poseidon’s gifts are being criminalized. What’s next, arresting the tide?”
Democrats stressed the captain showed remarkable restraint by allegedly selling the drugs instead of using them, calling it a bold example of small business entrepreneurship crushed by law enforcement.
Several argued that enforcing drug laws discourages Floridians from exploring the ocean, an activity Democrats say should remain unsupervised and consequence free.
Witnesses also reported spotting what appeared to be a shark behaving erratically nearby, which Democrats later dismissed as “completely unrelated” and “probably just another victim of President Trump’s drug policies.”
Trump supporters, meanwhile, praised the arrest as proof the administration’s war on narco-terrorists is leading to the arrests of smugglers, criminals, and idiots who believe mystical ocean deities are a more reasonable explanation than personal responsibility.
As of press time, Democrats were reportedly drafting a coastal equity bill requiring all found cocaine be gently returned to the sea with an apology.
It’s 🐂 💩 like this that chased me away from dad’s party the Dimwitted party that lately has stumbled on a way of self destruction. Defending suspicion as facts on high seas. Hollywood nor Netflix can generate a more false narrative than Cochin found on the high seas therefore worth my understanding I understand how mass suicide is reality. Why on earth do Dimwitted people like clockwork wake up on the wrong side of a drug bust🤷🏻. No wonder the Democratic Party is in the minority. People ask me Bobbie why did you leave the party politic? Really?
A couple of decades ago I used to fish with a friend who had the first three engine “go fast boat” I had seen. We ALWAYS got stopped and searched on the way back into port !
One day we got pulled over and searched during “ short lobster season.”
They asked to see our lobsters. We told them we haven’t been lobstering, we’ve been fishing !
They asked to see our fish. We told them we hadn’t caught any. They said, no one goes fishing during “ short lobster season ! “ we told them we forgot, had gone fishing and we’re just lousy
fisherman ! They didn’t believe us and started hauling out the equipment to start cutting into our deck ! Luckily, at the last minute, one of the officers realized who we were. He said, wait a minute, I’ve pulled these guys over a couple of times before. They are telling the truth. Their not running drugs. They never have fish either. They really are just lousy fisherman !!! (Oh, how I long for the good old days, when the only size or number limit on “square grouper” or any related species was “finders keepers, losers weepers”!)
Democrats have become the stupidest people to serve the American people. They lost a respect from all there corruption and care more about illegals than the American people. They destroyed this country by allowing 20-30 Million illegals invade our country and neighborhoods just so they can remain in power and control this is sickening. They are so corrupt they don’t care about hiding it anymore.
How about a ” civil war ” at the ballot box ? Each State will vote :”red or blue ” And after the ballot count the former USA will be divided into TWO different and independent Nations >Those States that don’t want Trump et al can have their own government + the opposite States don’t have to condone Obama ,Clinton , Biden , Pelosi ET AL > The process of government would NOT be a battle of 2 or more political parties attempting to gain power over EVERY problem that arises >>>If one group decides to allow Millions of people into their domain ,kill babies until they are 10 years old or what-ever ,Free everything then LET them BE >>> ” A Nation divided cannot stand ” One Nation under God is a good pan >>>
Doesn’t selling drugs equate to being a drug dealer no matter how you come by the drugs.
So he wasn’t arrested After Finding Cocaine at Sea, he was arrested for selling coke