President Trump’s second term began with a recently exposed economic scandal: the Biden administration had proudly reported jobs that never actually existed—unless you count shadow work in alternate dimensions, sources have confirmed.
Former BLS Commissioner Erika McEntarfer, Biden’s handpicked “data alchemist,” defended the report.
“We weren’t inflating numbers,” she explained.
“We were simply honoring the possibility of jobs. The same way we honor auto pen pardons”
Positions that exist if you squint hard enough.”
Progressives rushed to defend the phantom workforce, celebrating it as a milestone in equity hiring.
“Invisible jobs are the most inclusive jobs,” said one Democratic strategist.
“They require no qualifications, no hours, and no actual labor. Finally, a workplace free from capitalism and accountability.”
Trump shook his head at the revelation: “I inherited a weak economy, sure. But Biden left me jobs so fake, even CNN won’t run with them.”
As of press time, McEntarfer claimed unemployment from a ghost job, saying, ‘I worked it in spirit.’
charge ger with sedition and her and her handlers with criminal RICO