Desperate For Relevance, Don Lemon Attempts To Go Viral By Standing Near Any Crowd With A Chant

Former CNN anchor Don Lemon reportedly spent nearly nine consecutive hours wandering between unrelated protest groups this weekend in a desperate attempt to locate a chant that might restore his relevance, sources have confirmed

Witnesses say Lemon began his day following an anti-ICE rally, briefly pretended to understand their demands, then abandoned them after realizing his video got enough likes.

He was later spotted jogging toward three different crowds after hearing distant chanting, only to lose interest once he realized none of them were trending.

“He kept asking if anyone needed a journalist,” one protester said. “Then he’d whisper, ‘Former CNN,’ like that was supposed to mean something.”

Lemon allegedly filmed multiple introductions for a viral video that never materialized, restarting each take after checking his phone and muttering, “This doesn’t feel historic enough.”

Several progressive activists praised Lemon’s bravery, calling it “performative journalism” and “extremely online.”

The situation took a turn after Nicki Minaj unexpectedly called for Lemon to be jailed.

When pressed for a reason, Minaj reportedly waved it off, saying Lemon was “rude, disruptive, and desperately trying to be involved in things that have nothing to do with him,” before asking if anyone even still watches him.

Activists rushed to explain that accountability is only appropriate when applied to conservatives or people without blue checkmarks.

Lemon denied involvement in anything specific, insisting he was merely “documenting outrage in its natural habitat,” while critics noted he appeared to be aggressively shopping for one.

As of press time, Lemon was reportedly circling a peaceful gathering of people who weren’t protesting at all, hoping frustration alone would eventually turn it into content.