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Home U.S. News

Gavin Newsome Politely Asks Wildfires To ‘Move To a Different State or Something’

Joe King by Joe King
July 30, 2024
in U.S. News
9
Gavin Newsome Politely Asks Wildfires To ‘Move To a Different State or Something’
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As the state’s sixth largest wildfire of all time looms, Governor Gavin Newsome has politely asked the fires plaguing California if they’d please consider moving to a different state, sources confirm.

“Hey fire, it’s Gavin here,” began the bizarre speech Newsome gave earlier today. “We all noticed that you’re just continuing to spread and destroy communities, and we wondered if you could, like, not do that? That would be great. What if you just, like, you know, stopped? We think that’d be super. Maybe you could take it over to Nevada or something. Would you consider that?” 



Newsome’s hands-off approach disappointed many of his constituents. 

“Seriously, that’s his plan?” asked Joe Baldwin, a California resident. “I know he’s never really been tough on crime or homelessness or anything, but wow, this is a new low. I heard a rumor that he tried to bribe the fire by giving it a briefcase full of money that just burned right up. That’s probably bullshit, right?” 

At press time, as the fire continued to ignore the governor’s pleas and continued spreading, Newsome escalated matters and began yelling at the fire using a megaphone.

Tags: CaliforniaGavin Newsomewildfires
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Comments 9

  1. FedUp says:
    12 months ago

    Well folks, there you have it. This is what is running our country! Think about this when you go to vote!

    Reply
  2. Joe says:
    12 months ago

    Moron

    Reply
  3. Kipha L Valvoda says:
    12 months ago

    maybe if greasy jumped into the fire as a sacrifice it would be stated

    Reply
  4. Joan says:
    12 months ago

    What a jerk. Not a great speaker either. Does he always use ‘like’ in every sentence.

    Reply
  5. Tom ROBERTS says:
    12 months ago

    I guess old dumb, dumb has no idea of the fires burning in Oregon.

    Reply
  6. French says:
    12 months ago

    That’s the Pelosi gene speaking.

    Reply
  7. Streak says:
    12 months ago

    Newscum is a Dumb ass like all Libraturds Brain Dead. Its called Forest Management which the Dumb ASS Discontinued by Newsum the Brain Dead Idiot

    Reply
  8. Gerald says:
    12 months ago

    Who voted him into Office? you have to blame those who voted for him for the problems that California has. They had a chance to recall him but it failed. You reap what you sew.

    Reply
  9. Herb S says:
    11 months ago

    Keep him ot there, we don’t want him here.

    Reply

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