Donald Trump has signed an executive memorandum to relocate 30,000 illegal immigrants to the “luxurious” facilities at Guantanamo Bay, sources have confirmed.This unconventional move is touted by Trump as a “five-star solution to illegal immigration,” boasting that the amenities will include high-security fencing and 24-hour surveillance—features typical of a luxury resort, according to the former president.
“Everyone’s talking about border security, I’m just the only one doing something beautiful with it,” Trump stated during a press briefing, where he described plans to include waterboarding lessons as part of the recreational activities, referring to them as “extreme water sports.”
Critics have slammed the plan as inhumane and absurd, while supporters have praised Trump for his creativity and flair for the dramatic. Human rights organizations have been quick to condemn the idea, but Trump reassured them, saying, “Relax, we’ll throw in some beach volleyball courts and call it ‘Guantanamo Bay Resort and Spa.’”
As of press time, Trump’s team was seen distributing brochures that highlight the bay’s “breathtaking ocean views and escape-proof accommodations,” aiming to rebrand the detention center as the next big vacation hotspot.
That was great love it 😄 Thanks for the 😅 this early morning.
Enjoy your stay!
Very nice resort. Do cruise ships stop there?
Yes they are of the CRUISER And FRIGATE class.
And this beats Nexican time shares because the accommodations are free, including clothing and Healthcare. Don’t get those in the US. Should send all the has-been Democrat politicians; including, Nanzi-the-Lousy, the Clintonestas, and the Obamafiles. Did I miss anyone?
Schiff, Nadler, Schumer, and the rest of the filthy jew bastards.
Hey, only the best for the illegals😁. Probably going to have to expand the facilities though!!!
You don’t want them to be sun burned. So plenty of solutary confinement for mental thought of breaking our immigration laws. Nothing but the best.
Love it, brilliant idea.
Will GB R&S feature blueberry and strawberry fields that guests can volunteer to harvest during afternoon recreation time?
So that American ladies can still enjoy their breakfast smoothies?
Will GB R&S feature blueberry and strawberry fields that guests can volunteer to harvest during afternoon recreation time?
So that American ladies can still enjoy their breakfast smoothies?
No, but lots of sugar cane fields to harvest, and skeeters to give them exercise scratching the itches.
How about recycling the old cruise ships?
Instant housing, just drop it at the dock of your choice and leave it there.
Beats sending it to the breakers.
The volleyball net should be electrified, and there should be a separate gas chamber and crematory for the jew bastards.
I would have chosen “Station #3” , which is 100 nm to the east of Guantanamo.