In a touching display of government compassion, progressive leaders announced a bold new initiative called “The Forever Hug Program,” designed to cradle Americans in such aggressive support that escape becomes virtually impossible, sources have confirmed.
Standing alongside a banner that read “You’re Welcome, Please Stop Trying,” Bernie Sanders explained the program protects citizens from the dangerous side effects of success like savings accounts, upward mobility, and terrifying bursts of self-reliance.
“We saw people starting to improve their lives,” Sanders said gravely, “and we knew we had to intervene.”
AOC reassured reporters that any attempt to reduce dependency would be labeled literal violence.
Hollywood elites praised the program as “brave,” while reminding Americans that wanting control over your own future is problematic.
Analysts confirmed the system works flawlessly, keeping voters happily trapped in the same failing programs Democrats have proudly run for decades.
When Karoline Leavitt noted that years of nonstop Trump demonization helped create today’s toxic climate, officials clarified the real threat is anyone trying to loosen their “protective federal chains of love.”
As of press time, Democratic lawmakers were entertaining adding ankle monitors to make sure no citizen accidentally wanders into financial independence and ruins the whole beautiful system.
I don’t believe the Democrats will have to worry about a large portion of their Voters. They’re going on the fifth or sixth generation on the Democrat Government Plantation. Just like before 1865 under their Blue Thumbs.
Thats just how it is: the unending quest for complete control, and the circus loving, bread coveting sheep reliably insist on more of it.
could not have said it better myself
How come the politicians do not live among the illegals and new immigrants?
Who is the Scrape artist, and why is the top of most illustrations cut off?
Too much,
Too much “free stuff”.
When the businesses and the wealthy in money leave, it begins to look like Margarette Thatcher was correct. ‘The problem with socialism is that you eventually run out of other peoples’ money.’
I just hang a bag full of pennies in a plastic bag to keep the Democrats away from my home….They’re like flies…Anything shiny attracts them……..