SACRAMENTO, CA — California Gov. Gavin Newsom stepped in it big time this week, and by “it,” officials mean a steaming $20 million pile of taxpayer-funded diapers that somehow landed directly in the lap of a nonprofit run by his wife’s well-connected board buddy, sources have confirmed.
In what watchdogs are calling “perfectly normal California governance,” Newsom reportedly flushed emergency diaper funds into an organization whose top executive just happens to occupy a cushy seat near the Newsom family orbit.
“These are just diapers,” Newsom explained while changing his own political pants on live television.
“Perfectly normal to send millions to a friend of the family so California babies can enjoy gender-neutral, carbon-neutral, union-made butt protection.”
Newsom then accused critics of attacking democracy, hygiene, and clean bums.
Insiders say the program includes free golden diaper pins for donors, emergency “poop equity” webinars, and a lifetime supply of “I Survived The Recall” wipes.
Meanwhile, actual California parents are reportedly still wiping with old Newsom press releases because the state ran out of money after funding 47 high-speed rail ghost trains, a homeless tent empire, and a task force studying whether babies can identify as dry.
As of press time, Newsom was seen modeling an adult-sized luxury state diaper while insisting, “It’s not corruption. It’s leadership. And yes, it stinks, but only for thee, not for me.”
These articles are so stupid. Really funny, but I can see this actually happening in California.
Mike, you will be not surprise if you would live here. Anything said and wrote about the current governor it falls short of reality. Amazingly, the voters who elected him and others before him, still in denial but they do not call it as such but republicans faults. Either they are blind or just put it politely, stupid. I have read comments of hardcore leftist democrats and it is just overwhelming as you can imaging listening either AOC or Bernie in extra dosis of Adrenaline. Sadly, CA is the social experimental lab of the US; just to clarify for those who lives in CA, I am not saying it is Whuan Lab so there is no misunderstandings.
California is a beautiful state that Newscum has literally bankrupted and destroyed. We have 6 and $7 gas while some other states such as Idaho are paying between 2 and $3. The democrats have been shutting down refineries and heavily taxing fuel and then spending the earmarked highway funds for non-functional homeless programs that only enriches their donors. And now $20 million to supply diapers? They’re probably maid in China so his friend there can share in the windfall. He is using his last days in office to steal as much money from taxpayers as he can!