In a bold new approach to criminal justice—or perhaps luxury resort development—California has approved a $239 million makeover of San Quentin State Prison, complete with a grocery store, café, farmer’s market, and other upscale amenities, sources have confirmed.
Dubbed the “Norway Model,” the plan seeks to improve the well-being of those who “live and work” at the prison. Critics argue the terminology makes it unclear whether the funding is for inmates or Instagram influencers doing time. Supporters say it’s all about rehabilitation; skeptics say it’s all about re-election.
The remodel promises organic produce, barista-led coffee workshops, and possibly a yoga dome—leaving many Californians wondering whether they should commit a misdemeanor just to get on the waiting list.
As of press time, Zillow had added San Quentin to its list of “up-and-coming” neighborhoods, with a projected five-star Yelp rating once the café adds oat milk.
Only California would do this for murderers, rapists, etc.
That’s simply not True: NY, NJ, IL, CO, OR, WA, etc also reward murderers & rapists (not only CA).
Utter Stupidity !
How typical of Commiefornia!…. Homeless Vets are living on the streets, While Illegal Aliens are living in the hotels!.. Why not make a Spa for 230mil out of a prison…. Seems logical to me.
Hmmm…. I’m willing to take up criminal activity, but being a good guy, I don’t want to go too far. What’s the minimal acceptable bad behavior that will land me on The Rock?
Trump stop this immediately and take most of what these criminals get like a sex visit they are in prison to pay for breaking the law not on a vacation and it needs to get hard stricter punishment and if not violent then use them for farmers, fruit picking, so we won’t even need migrants anymore plus no fancy foods either, they live better than our veterans that is bull
It’s Cuntfornia,so why not. Fk the law-abiding people.
Sounds like all the other Gavin Gruesome initiatives. I get that it’s satire, but its too close to the truth. Were this real, Gav would’ve included a French Laundry restaurant, heavily subsidized of course, and 118 other cash a skimming scams.
Who said “crime doesn’t pay” — it looks like they “earned” it !!!