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Trump Pays Bond After Finding $500 Million in Couch

Joe King by Joe King
March 24, 2024
in Politics
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Trump Pays Bond After Finding $500 Million in Couch
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Former Preisdent Donald J. Trump claimed he was able to pay the recent $464 million judgment against him in his New York civil case after discovering a good amount of cash in his couch cushions, sources have confirmed. 

“I read something that said he was going to need to get a large bond issued on short notice or something,” said Elle Hawthorne, a housekeeper of Trump’s. “But then yesterday I heard him say ‘Screw all that’ and the next thing I know him and Barron were on their hands and knees digging money out of the couch. They came up with half a billion in no time.” 



Members of the New York Civil Court reluctantly accepted the loose piles of cash. 

“We’re not thrilled about it, but we will take it for now,” said Manhattan Supreme Court Judge Arthur Engoron, who issued the pricey ruling against Trump. “Although don’t be surprised if we spend way too much of our time and resources trying to get to the bottom of how a rich person could possibly come up with this much money. Maybe we’ll wake Mueller up and have him investigate it. Wasn’t that just a hoot last time?” 

Tags: civillawsuittrialtrump
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Comments 2

  1. Bob O'Brien says:
    1 year ago

    Wait until the next Republican Admn deals with this pack of fools, liars and crooks. Our country is in such dire need of ‘flushing the toilet’.

    Reply
  2. Plavchan Michael says:
    1 year ago

    I’m glad Mr. Trump and Barron found that this guy Eragon he is on my target hit list

    Reply

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