WASHINGTON — Elizabeth Warren has blamed President Trump for Americans missing Monday Night Football after YouTube TV lost its Disney channels, sources have confirmed.
“Trump’s been letting Big Streaming get away with this for years,” Warren declared, speaking from her office surrounded by commemorative Mickey mugs and a signed photo of Minnie.
When The Washington Post clarified that the dispute was a private contract negotiation, Warren doubled down:
“Exactly. Trump made them do it. His capitalist aura is so strong it bends corporate behavior.”
Leaked documents show Warren’s Platinum Mouseketeer Membership includes lifetime FastPass privileges, discounts on emotional-support chipmunks, and annual profit-sharing from Mickey Ear hat sales.
Critics noted that her defense of Disney might stem less from economic concern and more from her loyalty oath to “The Kingdom.”
One anonymous aide claims she once ended a staff meeting by shouting, “All hail the House of Mouse!”
When reporters pointed out YouTube TV offered cheaper rates, Warren scoffed, “That’s the problem! Trump’s America worships affordability — it’s toxic to imagination!”
As of press time, Senator Warren was overheard consoling one of Disneyland’s Goofys, assuring him it was Trump’s fault he hadn’t gotten his emotional-support payment approved by HR
So Minnie and Mickey are in front of a liberal judge in divorce court.
The judge questions Mickey about has filing.
I see here Mr. Mouse that you are filing for divorce on the grounds that you claim
that Minnie is crazy ! You know sir, just because Minnies political views are different than yours, just because she’s progressive, woke, supports DEI, believes men should play in women’s sports doesn’t mean that she’s crazy ! (?) I think you have a lot of nerve and I demand that you explain yourself sir ! Mickey retorts, I didn’t claim in my filing that Minnie was crazy judge, I said she was f_cking Goofy !
Get it ? She was f_cking Goofy ! OHhhhhhh !
Steamboat Willie wrote that joke!
Oldie, but goodie.
Vintage Joke but still a good one, and will be forever.
That airhead needs a whole lotta Prozac!
Joke of the day ! Warren is responsible for turning Mickey and Minnie into queers
Disney is a product of democrat destruction of male and female. Making sure Disney had special laws to help them traffic children
How many of you believe this person who used a lie to gain success ?
Not just any lie But claimed to be of native Indian decent Which gave her money for the real natives
How many never got to college because of her theft ?
She has been a ring leader in removing names of Indians from sports teams
Yet she stole money earmarked for them
And the rest she stole from us
Looney tunes Warren is Crazy as crazy can get ,I’m starting to think it is in the air and water up in Massachusetts, most of the Representatives the are Democrats are crazy as loon and it’s leads on down the Northeastern areas, very few people up that way are not crazy