The Daily Skrape
  • Politics
  • U.S. News
  • World News
  • Entertainment
  • Sports
SUBSCRIBE
No Result
View All Result
  • Politics
  • U.S. News
  • World News
  • Entertainment
  • Sports
No Result
View All Result
The Daily Skrape
No Result
View All Result
Home Politics

Trump Debuts New Bulletproof Suit To Be Worn During Future Speeches

Joe King by Joe King
July 29, 2024
in Politics
18
Trump Debuts New Bulletproof Suit To Be Worn During Future Speeches
5.9k
VIEWS
Share on FacebookShare on Twitter

Following an unsuccessful assassination attempt several weeks ago, Donald J. Trump has debuted the new robotic exoskeleton he will wear for all future speeches, sources confirmed earlier today. 

“This is the best armor money can buy, the absolute best,” said Trump, speaking before a crowd in Grand Rapids, Michigan. “Dressing from head to toe in bulletproof alloys may seem extreme to some people, but need I remind you: I was literally shot in the head a few speeches ago. I did everything right and they shot me!” 



Trump supporters seemed largely sympathetic to his new wardrobe of preference. 

“Nope, I don’t blame him one bit,” said local Trump voter Randall Weatherspoon. “Not only is it smart and safe, but he looks cooler than ever up there. And the part where he let us all open fire on him to prove how effective the suit is? What a hoot! I’ve never had more fun at one of these in my life.” 

As of press time, Trump’s speech was abruptly cut short after it started to lightly rain. 

Tags: assassinationelectionspeechtrump
Previous Post

George Clooney Op-Ed Implores Everyone to Check Out ‘Ocean’s 11’ on Cable

Next Post

Gavin Newsome Politely Asks Wildfires To ‘Move To a Different State or Something’

Joe King

Joe King

Next Post
Gavin Newsome Politely Asks Wildfires To ‘Move To a Different State or Something’

Gavin Newsome Politely Asks Wildfires To 'Move To a Different State or Something’

Comments 18

  1. John says:
    2 years ago

    The suit is one thing. But what about some nut just going after supporters to make a point? That could take place. And we know how corrupt the different depts. Are.

    Reply
  2. Marsha Hays says:
    2 years ago

    What ever it takes

    Reply
  3. Thomas Coleman says:
    2 years ago

    Teddy Roosevelt incarnate

    Reply
  4. GaMbaJd says:
    2 years ago

    This must be the Babylon Bee. Or the suit was designed by whoever is controlling Kamala. Since there is NO helmet suit would haven useless during last Deep State assassination attempt. Suit would only slow him down, making head shot easier.

    Reply
  5. rose says:
    2 years ago

    love love this ..

    go Trump 2024

    Reply
  6. Miss Eddy Wink says:
    2 years ago

    I think the shooter attempted a head shot. Does Defendant Trump need a suit of armor or a helmet? If I were him I’d gladly leave well enough alone, be thankful the kid missed and go play golf for the rest of my days but Defendant Trump is to stupid to do that.

    Reply
    • Jeff says:
      2 years ago

      Oh President Trump is too stupid? Yeah ok dumbazz. You see all that he has accomplished and you call him stupid lol. You dumb demoCrapRats or whatever you are have tunnel vision and your the one that’s straight up STUPID. Quit hating on one of our best presidents ever. Lil bitch made punk.

      Reply
  7. Dottie Delaney says:
    2 years ago

    I love your spoofs! I don’t know who your artists are but they are amazing!

    Reply
    • rose says:
      2 years ago

      me too .awesome …

      God save America

      Reply
  8. C. M. Westover says:
    2 years ago

    All of this is idiotic. You don’t make fun of anyone being shot. This country is devoid of any morals, decency, or common sense.

    Reply
    • Jeff says:
      2 years ago

      Facts

      Reply
  9. Streak says:
    2 years ago

    What about the HEAD

    Reply
  10. C catasus says:
    2 years ago

    THE DEMOCRATS ARE WILLING TO DO ANYTHING TO STAY IN POWER. EVEN KILL.
    CLINTON CHEATED A MILLION TIMES TO HILLARY WHILE IN OFFICE THEY DID NOT TRY TO PUT HIM IN JAIL. THEY STOLE MONEY ETC. BIDEN TAKES SHOWER WITH DAUGHTER, HE IS NOT A MOLESTER, HAS STOLEN MONEY ETC HUNTER BIDEN SELLS UGLY PAINTINGS FOR LOTS OF MONEY BECAUSE HIS BIDEN NAME.

    Reply
  11. C catasus says:
    2 years ago

    I DO NOT THINK THAT HARRIS IS GOING TO BE NOMINATED FOR PRESIDENT. OBAMA TRIED BEING PRESIDENT AND LOVED IT. HE WILL NOMINATE MICHAEL ROBINSON OBAMA SO HE CAN BE 8 MORE YEARS IN WHITE HOUSE. HE HAS ALREADY HAD 8 PLUS BIDENS 4 IT IS NOT ENOUGH HE WANTS MORE. HE HAS NOT DESTROID AMERICA YET. ANTICHRIST CREEP.

    Reply
  12. C catasus says:
    2 years ago

    THERE IS NO FREEDOM OF SPEECH THANKS TO YOU NEWS PERSONS YOU DESERVE WHAT IS COMING. ANOTHER CUBA, VENEZUELA, ETC.

    Reply
  13. Website Design Company in Kerala says:
    7 months ago

    This was beautiful Admin. Thank you for your reflections.

    Reply
  14. Freedom Fireworks says:
    3 weeks ago

    Smoke bombs produced thick, vibrant clouds. Great for gender reveals and photography.

    Reply
  15. Linda Macdonald says:
    2 weeks ago

    I appreciate you sharing this blog post. Thanks Again. Cool.

    Reply

Leave a Reply to Miss Eddy Wink Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

  • Trending
  • Comments
  • Latest
Gold

U.S. Victory Placed Under Review For Displaying Unregulated Patriotism

February 22, 2026
Voter ID

Nicki Minaj Accidentally Destroys the Entire Democrat Election Machine

February 4, 2026
ID LAWS

Jeffries Accidentally Reads the ‘Please Don’t Enforce the Laws’ Page of the Democrat Playbook on Live TV

February 8, 2026
at the movies

Left Redefines Math After ‘Melania’ Crushes Box Office: ‘Zero Is Whatever Hurts Trump’

February 7, 2026
Gold

U.S. Victory Placed Under Review For Displaying Unregulated Patriotism

27
Patel

Left Demands Congressional Hearing After Kash Patel Recklessly Celebrates U.S. Hockey Victory Without Apologizing to Canada

25
SOTU

Democrats Stage Full Toddler Tantrum During State of the Union

20
RealWages

Tim Walz Proposes Americans Pay Emotional Damages To Employers Forced To Hire Legally

16
Padres Lose

Padres Lose Pitcher to Taxes, Newsom Promises Replacement Player Will Arrive on High-Speed Rail

March 1, 2026
housing

Several NYC Landlords Respond to ‘White Supremacy’ Claim With Four Words: “We’re Literally Not White”

February 28, 2026
taffer

Taffer Warns Healthy Americans Could Devastate Deep-Fried Economy

February 28, 2026
Same Ol Kimmel

Kimmel Extends Anti-Trump Contract, Says ‘Why Risk A New Joke?’

February 27, 2026
The Daily Skrape

© 2025 DailySkrape.com. All Rights Reserved.

Site Information

  • About
  • Privacy Policy
  • Terms of Service
  • Subscribe

Follow Us

No Result
View All Result
  • Politics
  • U.S. News
  • World News
  • Sports
  • Entertainment
SUBSCRIBE

© 2025 DailySkrape.com. All Rights Reserved.

I Want You!

...to join our mailing list!

Enter your email address

Thanks, I’m not interested