A sloppy, stuttering doctor has recently defied decades of agreed-upon medical logic and insisted that drinking two or three bottles of wine a day is good for you, actually.
“I’m totally s-s-serious you guys,” said Doctor Tim Rodgers, in between hiccups. “People like my stupid ex-wife are always trying to tell us what to do. Well, guess what? I’m going on record and saying that pounding a few bottles of cheap wine before bed every night is actually good for you. What do you think of that, Linda? It’s science now!”
While certainly a minority opinion in the medical community, Rodgers’s experience and education sadly mean that his controversial theory has to be taken at least a little bit seriously.
“I don’t think it makes a lot of sense,” said Shawn Whitmore, a local that wasn’t convinced he should be drinking upwards of three entire bottles of wine a day. “But as a doctor with a full degree from The Baylor College of Medicine, we have to respect his findings. Man, it’s just so hard to keep up with the medical community sometimes, isn’t it?”
As of press time, several other doctors who weren’t afraid of a good time have also come forward to recommend smashing two or three bottles of wine a day.
Hell, vodka works just as well! I known that for years. I’m glad the medical community is getting honest.
I’d trust this Doctor’s medical advice over Fauci or anyone else from the CDC for that matter.
Dr. Jill Biden stand by this philosophy as well.
Or Resveratol > at LEAST grape juice/ whole grapes. “There is no medicinal benefit from alcohol” ~ Medical Profession
It sure makes me feel better!! Screw aspirin!
I think the esteemed doctor is a bit behind the curve; medical experts like Nancy Pelosi have been doubling his recommendation for years. The drunk old Queen Hag has 3 bottles before most of us have had a coffee break.
Must be Nancy Pelosi’s doc.