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WASHINGTON, D.C. — Election-season doctors reportedly identified a severe outbreak of Political Memory Loss this week after candidates who once...

WASHINGTON, D.C. — The United States Senate reportedly experienced the greatest miracle in government history Wednesday when the adjournment bell...

NEW YORK, NY — A judge reportedly forced City Hall to redo its second-home tax rollout this week after officials...

WASHINGTON, D.C. — America’s private sector reportedly added 90,000 jobs in September, immediately confusing thousands of grown adults who had...

BOSTON, MA — City officials reportedly unveiled a $575 civic-leadership scholarship program for immigrants this week, then informed native-born Bostonians...

WASHINGTON, D.C. — America’s education system reportedly declared its greatest victory in decades Monday after AI finally made it possible...

SILICON VALLEY, CA — Google and Microsoft reportedly celebrated a breakthrough in artificial intelligence Monday after their spam filters became...

JACKSONVILLE, FL — The NFL reportedly reached peak modernity Sunday after a ball attendant yelled “You can’t touch me!” at...

LOS ANGELES, CA — Los Angeles reportedly entered the final stage of its political transformation this week after democratic socialists...

MADISON, WI — Wisconsin parents reportedly entered financial cardiac arrest Thursday after learning their college-aged sons had allegedly converted hundreds...