WEST HOLLYWOOD, CA — Hollywood activists were left devastated this week after a massive water main break flooded Sunset Boulevard and failed to destroy artificial intelligence, mostly because AI reportedly lives in the cloud and not inside a Starbucks audition line, sources have confirmed.
Insiders say the flooding began as part of a bold anti-AI resistance plan after several leftist producers theorized that enough water could short-circuit the algorithms replacing their terrible scripts.
“This was our last chance,” said one screenwriter while floating past a closed oat milk café on a door from a canceled Netflix reboot.
“If AI keeps writing movies, who will create brave content about lonely billionaires learning climate grief from a bisexual raccoon?”
Unfortunately for Hollywood, AI immediately used the disaster to generate a post-apocalyptic blockbuster titled Sunset Floods, featuring distraught actors surviving without Starbucks, commercial auditions, or a single opportunity to rant about capitalism on Instagram.
The servers then diagnosed the infrastructure failure, suggested practical repair options, and offered to donate the film proceeds to help rebuild, which enraged activists even further.
“How dare wealthy AI producers share the wealth!” screamed one protester, before aides reminded her that sharing wealth was technically the entire point of yesterday’s protest.
As of press time, Hollywood had denounced Sunset Floods as soulless, derivative, and unfairly better than anything they had written since 2014.
