MONTEVIDEO, URUGUAY — NYC socialist candidate Darializa Avila Chevalier reassured voters she remains fully focused on her general election while campaigning several thousand miles away in Uruguay, sources have confirmed.
Chevalier reportedly began knocking on doors in Montevideo.
“Hi, I’m running for Congress in New York.”
“Wonderful,” replied one resident.
“We live in Uruguay.”
Campaign aides immediately launched the Open Borders, Open Ballots Initiative, arguing geographic boundaries are an outdated capitalist restriction on democracy.
One strategist suggested mail-in ballots.
Another quietly explained Uruguayans cannot vote in New York elections.
He was reassigned to geography.
Progressive activists defended the trip while simultaneously posting photos of President Trump golfing in Florida and demanding to know why he was “never working.”
A reporter noted Florida is actually in the United States.
“Stop weaponizing maps,” an organizer replied.
The DSA then opened its first international field office after discovering global socialism has plenty of global socialists but remarkably few registered voters in Manhattan.
Volunteers began stuffing campaign literature into bottles and throwing them toward New York.
Back home, constituents watched Chevalier explain how focused she remained on them from another continent.
As of press time, campaign officials were demanding borderless democracy after Google Maps once again imposed arbitrary lines between countries.
You get what you vote for. NYC already starting to die. Give it ten years and it will become just like Detroit. Once a jewel now a hole.
Its already begun.
Like venezuela- not detroit
I live in Kingston, Pa. I am about an hour and a half away from NYC. This nonsense is terrifying my wife, who keeps reminding me how close the craziness is. I remind her that something like 80% of the NEPA votes went to Trump. And the coal region knows how to fight back.
Meanwhile, youngsters are saying that socialism is a great idea, but only because they have been protected from it by capitalism. I guess it would help if someone had taught them that. “The reason you think that a rattlesnake is a great pet is that you have never been bitten. But yes, they are handsome snakes.”