Philadelphia’s “good boys” defense collided head-first with Florida reality this weekend when eight teenage members of a youth football team attempted the classic blue-city shoplifting routine inside a Dick’s Sporting Goods — only to discover they were in Polk County under Sheriff Grady Judd, sources have confirmed.
Deputies say the teens were caught stuffing more than $2,000 worth of merchandise into a decoy Dick’s bag like they were rehearsing for a future crime-themed talent show.
Moments later, their coach sprinted toward deputies shouting the official motto of progressive discipline:
“Don’t arrest them! They’re GOOD boys!”
Sheriff Judd responded with enough truth to short-circuit the man:
“Son, jail is FULL of good boys who made stupid decisions. Yours are about to join the junior varsity of bad choices.”
The coach, stunned that consequences were occurring in real time, then pleaded, “Don’t y’all have something better to do?”
Judd smiled politely.“Actually, I do — but arresting thieves comes first. Welcome to Polk County.”
Deputies later said the coach seemed genuinely confused by the concept of accountability, whispering, “That’s not how it works where we’re from,” as if personal responsibility were a rare Florida wildlife species.
As of press time, the teens were still behind bars as their coach desperately cycled through excuses ranging from “they thought everything was complimentary” to “our balloon-animal mascot died tragically.” Sheriff Judd didn’t even blink.
I’m thinking the crime rate in Polk County is low. More of this accountability throughout our country is needed. Three cheers to the sheriff!
Good. The parents of these thugs will have a “reality” check! And the thieves, a record. Lesson learn? Time will tell.
Here is my SALUTE to Sheriff Judd for upholding the law.
philly is a mess of crime. what decent person wopuld live there anymore.
About time there’s accountability! FaFo!
Thank you Sheriff Judd.
This is why we love our life in Florida. It is not just the weather, our safety is a major priority.
Thoughts for a Lifetime. Use them.
Frederick Douglass : It is easier to build strong children, than it is to repair broken men. Straighten them out, and keep them straight, at 15, so they aren’t shot at 20.
Sheriff judd runs REAL law enforcement. This team is from ny, and since the mayor is changing to a socialism society in new york, everything belongs to everybody. These guys were just practicing for their new legal landscape where , since everything is everybodys, they will be able to take anything they want since it is theirs anyway!
Why does the cartoon depiction show white boys? They were not white.
HOORAY for Sheriff JUDD and His DEPUTIES for Keeping the Citizens of POLK County FLORIDA SAFE and NOT TOLERATING CRIME OF ANY TYPE PUT CRIMINALS in JAIL Revive WORK CAMPS and ROAD GANGS to Make Criminals Pay for Their KEEP THANKS Sheriff JUDD and YOUR DEPARTMENT for GREAT SERVICE TO POLK County and the State of FLORIDA